I HAVE NOT PROOF READ THIS.. IT IS AS IS!
I want to meet you already. Haven’t you had enough of that guy that keeps dissing you? Well leave him! Go out, meet people. You are valuable, you are beautiful, and you are the woman of my dreams. You don’t know me, but I am telling you that this man will do anything for you! I’m not sure why we haven’t met yet. But i’m waiting for you! I am dating to spend time while I wait for you to be done with all your trial and errors. I think it’s best that you do that because I am going to love you forever. And I know you need to be ready for that. So let those guys dance around the truth, say things that are not nice or disappoint you. Just know that I am here waiting for you when you are ready. Waiting to love you. Waiting to give you all of me. My soul begs for you and I will work to my limit for you, to give you everything you want. I’m not sure why you haven’t showed up yet. Perhaps that guy with the degree or the TV show, or the bass player of that band, or the stock broker who claims he’ll hit, holds you captive for a moment, but i’m telling you when you’re done I’m here waiting for you... with everything. With the real stuff. With everything I got. With everything I am. With Love! Oh, and by the way I do have a degree in Psychology, and have several TV shows.. but what I don’t have is you!
I keep writing, I keep directing, I keep talking to my friends about their marriage. I’ve decided that you will come when the time is right.. and it’s 11:59pm. I can feel it. When I wake up i feel a hope, a dream come true that is you! I know you already. I know what you want. What you need. How you like your breakfast. How you like your french tips done and when you want Sushi. When you feel like buying a new outfit. I will buy it for you. How you are in the morning. How you want me to just listen to you after a hard day. I’ll listen to you after your girlfriend pisses you off. After your family or client made you so made that you feel like exploding. I am here for you to soften the blow, to massage your tense muscles... to make love to you in a way you’ve never been made love to... to be everything and anything you want me to be... but you don’t have to ask. I already know. I’ll even happily dance with you to Don Omar, Pit Bull, salsa, or some 80’s retro ban. I know exactly how you want your drink. Extra Dirty Martini, vodka tonic, some sweet fruity drink, or a light beer. It’s a dance that is perfected over time between two people, but with you and I, time stands still. Our bodies will be one of the same. I'll have what you need and want, and you'll have what I want and need. You'll know me too. What I like, how to respect me and our relationship, how to make me feel like the luckiest man on earth. And if you don't know things about me, you'll take the time to find out. You're patient, bratty at times (but i love that), sincere, unassuming, respectful, confident, intelligent, and graceful. I'll feel like you are always on my side, no matter who is sitting in front of us. We are a team of one. 2 entities merged to one. We are the rhythm, the narrative and soul of our story. "US"
So what’s taking you so long? I guess it’s ok for now. I’ll keep meeting impostors who claim that they are you. And I keep discovering pretty quickly they are not.
So please hurry up my love. I’m getting tired. But I am very exited to meet you.
Your Love,
GMT
Showing posts with label first love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label first love. Show all posts
Saturday, April 7, 2012
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
The Girl Effect
My five sisters were very lucky to have had the opportunity and love all women and people should have in this life... Some are not so lucky.
CLICK HERE TO WATCH VIDEO
CLICK HERE TO WATCH VIDEO
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
The 5 Stages After a Breakup (Female)
Here’s a snapshot of a more complex phenomena, the 5 stages a female may go through after a breakup.
Stage One: Denial and Despair (D&D)
Shock and fear create a sense of denial. “I can’t believe this is happening to me,” and “This is just temporary, we’ll work it out,” followed by “he’ll come around.” Sadness, a sense of fear, and a ton of other emotions are looming.
Stage Two: Desperation, Panic, and Depression (DPD)
A realization that the break-up is really happening emerges. Efforts to save it kick in. Sadness, crying, depression, and loneliness run high and sponsor desperate behaviors and thoughts. Thoughts: I miss him, I love him, and I’ll never find anyone like him again. I don’t want to be alone. Self-doubt and self blame consumes the female. “What did I do?” “Am I not good enough?” “What could I’ve done differently and what can I do to show him I’m good for him?” The female tries to get him back by doing things for him she didn’t do while they were together. Female remains determined that relationship can be saved but is in panic survival mode.
Stage Three: Anger “F#ck You” Stage
“I am woman hear me roar” is this stage’s motto. Songs like Gloria Gaynor’s “I will survive” were made because and for this stage. Female develops a cocky attitude towards her ex (it’s obvious, we can tell). She is tired of “trying” and being there for him without the results she wants – which is to be dating again. Nothing less will do for her. Therefore, “I need him” turns into “I don’t need that loser.” “I deserve better,” become the alternating mantra for the female and her girlfriends who are now her cheerleaders against the asshole, her ex. Girls Night Out becomes common and dating strange men is more than encouraged by her friends, it’s sometimes planned by them. The dating and attitude provides a sense of confidence. Look for behaviors such as “beginning a workout routine,” “shopping spree,” and or drastic hair change (A Cut or different hair style or both!). More make-up and revealing attire is apparent…and plenty of Apple Martini’s. Female may start to date one particular man continuously or many men to get over her “broken heart," and that "asshole."
Stage Four: Confusion
Thoughts: What am I doing? I don’t feel like myself. I miss my ex, but I like the new guy too. I miss the way we used to be together. We know each other, we have history. It’s not the same with this new dude. Remember ladies, a new guy is on his best behavior (hopefully) in the beginning and comparing that behavior to your ex’s at the end of the relationship may mislead you down a dark path. Female decides to break off the new relationship and decides she needs to date herself (Which is the right thing to do in my opinion).
Alternate Decision from Confusion:
Stage Four: Suppression and Love Bandaid.
Female decides to move forward with the new relationship and suppresses unresolved feelings for ex, good or bad. The relationship will continue until the female is completely involved with a new guy, but will always be sensitive when it comes to that particular ex for which she has not released her feelings.
***Warning: New relationships rarely have the legs to survive since many times it's based on irrational and emotional heartache and the need to feel loved and connected instead of solely on the merits of the new guy and new genuine connection and love. And besides, it's not fair to the new man not getting a true you without the emotional baggage.
Stage Five: Recovery
After dating herself and allowing herself to mourn and process the break-up, female is a new woman and ready for love in a real way. But the irony is that she doesn’t feel she needs to be in a relationship. In turn, she will become even more attractive to the opposite sex. She promises never to repeat stage four and other stages again after a break-up. (But most do repeat it, it’s inevitable). She will attract worthy potential mates and be in the position to create a wonderful, lasting, and loving relationship.
Personal Statement:
Ladies, mourn your loss, process those feelings and don’t start changing your life. Making drastic changes like going out to bars when you never did and acting out of character to deal with hurt feelings will only leave you feeling lonely, empty, and more importantly not yourself.
Keep as much of your life the same and intact after the break-up. Change, good or bad brings upon stress and anxiety and you don’t want to pile it on when you are most vulnerable. Experiencing a loss can throw anyone into a downward spiral of depression and negativity. It’s best to keep loyal to yourself and do the things you liked to do while giving yourself the time and allowance to feel and work through your emotional journey. Alcohol, acting out-of-character, going out more than usual, and the relentless dating a new guy quickly, could all be signs of acting out and will get you emotionally and physically exhausted. This will make it even harder to deal with remaining emotions and resentment you have for your ex. This will keep you stagnate and unable to move smoothly past your break-up to the life you really deserve.
The last thing you want to do is not be ready for a real relationship because you’re bogged down with leftover emotional crap and don't show up with an internal clean slate. You may even bring a lurking ex which is a huge relationship-killer. So be fair to your future new wonderful mate you plan to meet. Take time for yourself first to process your break-up without acting out. That is the time to think about your wants and desires, and who and where you want to be. You’ll also learn what you don’t like, what you do like, and how you can be a better version of yourself next time. You’ll thank yourself later for it. And so will the new man! Besides, they say never buy a car or a house when you are desperate for one, you’ll end up making horrible judgments.
Sure, go out, have fun, and live your life. Get the occasional needed attention from the opposite sex by wearing that black little dress you have been wanting to wear that your ex never complimented you on. But don’t lose yourself. Your ex and the emotions are not worth it. Your past relationship can offer valuable lessons for you if you reflect and perhaps a friendship with your ex later down the line (if you desire). So take the time for yourself before dancing to “I will survive,” every night, you’re worth it!
Love and Peace always...
(P.S. I've written the above because I have witnessed it as an ex, as the new guy, and as the female best friend.)
Stage One: Denial and Despair (D&D)
Shock and fear create a sense of denial. “I can’t believe this is happening to me,” and “This is just temporary, we’ll work it out,” followed by “he’ll come around.” Sadness, a sense of fear, and a ton of other emotions are looming.
Stage Two: Desperation, Panic, and Depression (DPD)
A realization that the break-up is really happening emerges. Efforts to save it kick in. Sadness, crying, depression, and loneliness run high and sponsor desperate behaviors and thoughts. Thoughts: I miss him, I love him, and I’ll never find anyone like him again. I don’t want to be alone. Self-doubt and self blame consumes the female. “What did I do?” “Am I not good enough?” “What could I’ve done differently and what can I do to show him I’m good for him?” The female tries to get him back by doing things for him she didn’t do while they were together. Female remains determined that relationship can be saved but is in panic survival mode.
Stage Three: Anger “F#ck You” Stage
“I am woman hear me roar” is this stage’s motto. Songs like Gloria Gaynor’s “I will survive” were made because and for this stage. Female develops a cocky attitude towards her ex (it’s obvious, we can tell). She is tired of “trying” and being there for him without the results she wants – which is to be dating again. Nothing less will do for her. Therefore, “I need him” turns into “I don’t need that loser.” “I deserve better,” become the alternating mantra for the female and her girlfriends who are now her cheerleaders against the asshole, her ex. Girls Night Out becomes common and dating strange men is more than encouraged by her friends, it’s sometimes planned by them. The dating and attitude provides a sense of confidence. Look for behaviors such as “beginning a workout routine,” “shopping spree,” and or drastic hair change (A Cut or different hair style or both!). More make-up and revealing attire is apparent…and plenty of Apple Martini’s. Female may start to date one particular man continuously or many men to get over her “broken heart," and that "asshole."
Stage Four: Confusion
Thoughts: What am I doing? I don’t feel like myself. I miss my ex, but I like the new guy too. I miss the way we used to be together. We know each other, we have history. It’s not the same with this new dude. Remember ladies, a new guy is on his best behavior (hopefully) in the beginning and comparing that behavior to your ex’s at the end of the relationship may mislead you down a dark path. Female decides to break off the new relationship and decides she needs to date herself (Which is the right thing to do in my opinion).
Alternate Decision from Confusion:
Stage Four: Suppression and Love Bandaid.
Female decides to move forward with the new relationship and suppresses unresolved feelings for ex, good or bad. The relationship will continue until the female is completely involved with a new guy, but will always be sensitive when it comes to that particular ex for which she has not released her feelings.
***Warning: New relationships rarely have the legs to survive since many times it's based on irrational and emotional heartache and the need to feel loved and connected instead of solely on the merits of the new guy and new genuine connection and love. And besides, it's not fair to the new man not getting a true you without the emotional baggage.
Stage Five: Recovery
After dating herself and allowing herself to mourn and process the break-up, female is a new woman and ready for love in a real way. But the irony is that she doesn’t feel she needs to be in a relationship. In turn, she will become even more attractive to the opposite sex. She promises never to repeat stage four and other stages again after a break-up. (But most do repeat it, it’s inevitable). She will attract worthy potential mates and be in the position to create a wonderful, lasting, and loving relationship.
Personal Statement:
Ladies, mourn your loss, process those feelings and don’t start changing your life. Making drastic changes like going out to bars when you never did and acting out of character to deal with hurt feelings will only leave you feeling lonely, empty, and more importantly not yourself.
Keep as much of your life the same and intact after the break-up. Change, good or bad brings upon stress and anxiety and you don’t want to pile it on when you are most vulnerable. Experiencing a loss can throw anyone into a downward spiral of depression and negativity. It’s best to keep loyal to yourself and do the things you liked to do while giving yourself the time and allowance to feel and work through your emotional journey. Alcohol, acting out-of-character, going out more than usual, and the relentless dating a new guy quickly, could all be signs of acting out and will get you emotionally and physically exhausted. This will make it even harder to deal with remaining emotions and resentment you have for your ex. This will keep you stagnate and unable to move smoothly past your break-up to the life you really deserve.
The last thing you want to do is not be ready for a real relationship because you’re bogged down with leftover emotional crap and don't show up with an internal clean slate. You may even bring a lurking ex which is a huge relationship-killer. So be fair to your future new wonderful mate you plan to meet. Take time for yourself first to process your break-up without acting out. That is the time to think about your wants and desires, and who and where you want to be. You’ll also learn what you don’t like, what you do like, and how you can be a better version of yourself next time. You’ll thank yourself later for it. And so will the new man! Besides, they say never buy a car or a house when you are desperate for one, you’ll end up making horrible judgments.
Sure, go out, have fun, and live your life. Get the occasional needed attention from the opposite sex by wearing that black little dress you have been wanting to wear that your ex never complimented you on. But don’t lose yourself. Your ex and the emotions are not worth it. Your past relationship can offer valuable lessons for you if you reflect and perhaps a friendship with your ex later down the line (if you desire). So take the time for yourself before dancing to “I will survive,” every night, you’re worth it!
Love and Peace always...
(P.S. I've written the above because I have witnessed it as an ex, as the new guy, and as the female best friend.)
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Honeymoon-How'd We Get That Term?
As my nephew and his new bride to be go off into their life...Here's a quick historical explanation of the term honeymoon..
An ancient Northern European custom prescribed newlyweds, for the first month of their married life, to drink a daily cup of honeyed wine called mead. Honey was known to have vitamins which gave the couple energy and health both of which they needed for "other things." As time went on, the term morphed and included the term "moon" to figuratively represent a month of marriage and that no "moon" was sweeter than the first one of marriage, the honeymoon.
An ancient Northern European custom prescribed newlyweds, for the first month of their married life, to drink a daily cup of honeyed wine called mead. Honey was known to have vitamins which gave the couple energy and health both of which they needed for "other things." As time went on, the term morphed and included the term "moon" to figuratively represent a month of marriage and that no "moon" was sweeter than the first one of marriage, the honeymoon.
Friday, October 9, 2009
Some Kind Of Wonderful-Kiss
I used to think Mary Stuart Masterson was pretty and this movie and scene was a romantic guide post in my teens as I started to create my own John Hughes moments...Uh, thanks to my sisters...
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
CHASING ALYSSA MILANO
I wrote a love letter to Alyssa Milano. The fact that she was the hottest teen actor at the time and millions of teenage boys wanted to meet her didn’t stop me from writing a very passionate and honest love letter to her. I thought perhaps I had a chance. That was only because I was about to actually meet her. Every Friday afternoon my friends and I would visit the set of Who’s The Boss. I’d become friendly with the guards, the page that worked there, even Tony Danza. After a while I didn’t even have to wait in line to get in. My parents would drop me off at 4pm and one of my sisters would pick me up around 10pm after the second taping of the show. It was Alyssa’s birthday and I thought it was the perfect day to give her that letter. I was invited onto the set by a friend after the show where they would sing happy birthday to Alyssa in front of a huge cake with a gazillion candles (really only about 11 or 12).
While some kids had posters of their teen heartthrobs on the wall like Kirk Cameron or Justine Bateman, I had mine right in front of me, smiling. I reached out my hand and said “Happy Birthday Alyssa.” I don’t think she noticed my shaking hands. We all started talking about nonsense. It was me, my friend, Alyssa Milano and the letter tucked away in my pocket. I don’t remember what the heck I was saying. All I could remember is thinking about the perfect time to give her that darn letter. I reached in my pocket, grabbed the letter and just as I was about to pull it out, Alyssa was called away by the director. Suddenly my friend also left to take a picture with another cast member. There I was alone letter in pocket. I decided to leave but I saw Danny Pintauro (Who played Alyssa’s brother on the show), standing alone with a piece of cake in hand. I had an idea. I asked Danny to give the letter to Alyssa and told him to tell her that the letter was from the boy she just met through our mutual friend and that it was very important that she get this letter on her birthday. Danny smiled politely and said “sure” in that prepubescent voice. My friend and I decided to leave.
We stood outside the studio for 45 minutes waiting for my sister to pick us up. Suddenly we see a white sedan pull out of the studio drive-way. In the back seat sat Alyssa Milano. At that moment my sister Vickie pulls up. She is the closest I had to having a brother, tough and beyond tomboy. We hopped in to my dad's orange station wagon. I told Vickie that Alyssa Milano was in the white car that was making a right on Gower Street. She looked back at us and said, “Well then, we should follow that car.” She slammed on the gas and we raced after the white sedan. She knew I liked Alyssa and I guess she thought… well I don’t know what the heck she was thinking to tell you the truth.
We were speeding up the 101 Freeway closing in on the white car. What was I trying to accomplish? This is stalking. What would happen when we caught up to the car? Was Alyssa supposed to step out of the car and run into my arms? Or was she going to throw her phone number into my window and signal me to call her that night? She would likely call the cops instead. We exited Coldwater Canyon and suddenly I felt that we were getting to close. “This is wrong” I said out loud. My sister slowed down and asked me if I wanted to stop or go after her. Even though the experience was like a car-chase scene from an 80’s movie like Weird Science and I was having an exciting time, I felt I had to stop. The truth was that my “chasing” had already taken place in a real way (and without being a 12 year old stalker.) While most admire celebrities from a far, I managed to bring my celebrity crush close, so close that I was able to meet her on her birthday and send her a love letter up close and personal. Well I never knew if the letter actually got to her and I’m sure it was one of a million she received (or maybe 1 in a million). The point is I made a fantasy come true in a real way, my innocent way. What was I actually expecting at age twelve anyway, that a TV actress and I would fall in love and live happily ever after? Come on! In my twenties I bumped into her at a local LA lounge. She walked past me and smiled. I nodded my head and smiled back with a drink in hand. I’m sure she didn’t remember one bit.
While some kids had posters of their teen heartthrobs on the wall like Kirk Cameron or Justine Bateman, I had mine right in front of me, smiling. I reached out my hand and said “Happy Birthday Alyssa.” I don’t think she noticed my shaking hands. We all started talking about nonsense. It was me, my friend, Alyssa Milano and the letter tucked away in my pocket. I don’t remember what the heck I was saying. All I could remember is thinking about the perfect time to give her that darn letter. I reached in my pocket, grabbed the letter and just as I was about to pull it out, Alyssa was called away by the director. Suddenly my friend also left to take a picture with another cast member. There I was alone letter in pocket. I decided to leave but I saw Danny Pintauro (Who played Alyssa’s brother on the show), standing alone with a piece of cake in hand. I had an idea. I asked Danny to give the letter to Alyssa and told him to tell her that the letter was from the boy she just met through our mutual friend and that it was very important that she get this letter on her birthday. Danny smiled politely and said “sure” in that prepubescent voice. My friend and I decided to leave.
We stood outside the studio for 45 minutes waiting for my sister to pick us up. Suddenly we see a white sedan pull out of the studio drive-way. In the back seat sat Alyssa Milano. At that moment my sister Vickie pulls up. She is the closest I had to having a brother, tough and beyond tomboy. We hopped in to my dad's orange station wagon. I told Vickie that Alyssa Milano was in the white car that was making a right on Gower Street. She looked back at us and said, “Well then, we should follow that car.” She slammed on the gas and we raced after the white sedan. She knew I liked Alyssa and I guess she thought… well I don’t know what the heck she was thinking to tell you the truth.
We were speeding up the 101 Freeway closing in on the white car. What was I trying to accomplish? This is stalking. What would happen when we caught up to the car? Was Alyssa supposed to step out of the car and run into my arms? Or was she going to throw her phone number into my window and signal me to call her that night? She would likely call the cops instead. We exited Coldwater Canyon and suddenly I felt that we were getting to close. “This is wrong” I said out loud. My sister slowed down and asked me if I wanted to stop or go after her. Even though the experience was like a car-chase scene from an 80’s movie like Weird Science and I was having an exciting time, I felt I had to stop. The truth was that my “chasing” had already taken place in a real way (and without being a 12 year old stalker.) While most admire celebrities from a far, I managed to bring my celebrity crush close, so close that I was able to meet her on her birthday and send her a love letter up close and personal. Well I never knew if the letter actually got to her and I’m sure it was one of a million she received (or maybe 1 in a million). The point is I made a fantasy come true in a real way, my innocent way. What was I actually expecting at age twelve anyway, that a TV actress and I would fall in love and live happily ever after? Come on! In my twenties I bumped into her at a local LA lounge. She walked past me and smiled. I nodded my head and smiled back with a drink in hand. I’m sure she didn’t remember one bit.
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